Monthly Archives: May 2013

Reflections through time…

I just found this family photo of my ship leaving Venus on the first mission to Earth. For kunts and kunts (Venusian years) we avoided your planet like the plague…  absolutely terrified of your vegetarians and vegans. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>   A … Continue reading

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Words I like

Love, bubbles, squiggles, Twinkly fairy sprinkles, Light, rainbows, unicorns, Frizzly, snazzy, wavy horns, Cookie, kitty, cutie pie, Chuckle, giggle, wonder why. Dick, fuck, skank and cock, Choppity, floppity, bunny hop. Deep, boogie, slip and slide, Whizz, fly, scream and hide, … Continue reading

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Flying FUCKs

I was sitting quietly under a tree, eating my spicy duck tongues, washing them down with some fresh sheep’s blood, when a strange scabby man came along and obtrusively sat himself down right next to me. I was sitting alone … Continue reading

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Feng shui is a bitch

Last night I stared at all the dirty saucepans and casserole dishes piling up in my cockroach infested sink and thought to myself, That chicken breast and burnt cheese will be much easier to clean after a night of drinking … Continue reading

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Deeper questions

As I sit sipping my morning coffee I like to ponder the greater mysteries of life… Why is the sky blue? Why do people smoke meth? Why are my elbows so ugly? If only I had the answers to these … Continue reading

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The world’s biggest cover-up?

Boobs. We all agree we love them. Big ones, small ones, in betweeners. So why is it we spend all our time restricting access to them? I’ll tell you why. It’s a big, fat conspiracy. An evil conspiracy against nipples … Continue reading

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Poetry time

New religion, Old religion, Green, Blue and Gold religion, Big religion, Bold religion, Tell the story of old religion Taunt religion, Flaunt religion, Hold, teach, support religion, Their religion, Your religion, Mine’s the freaking best religion, No religion, Fake religion, … Continue reading

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